WALKIN' ON SUNSHINE WOAAAH
LLLena { Same Shit Different Day } ☂ 
I'm a big fan of television, movies and music. AND HANDSOME GUYS DUH I love discovering new tv shows, new fandoms, new artists. NEW FAVORITES TO UH STALK? LUST OVER?? I'm trying to start reading and writing again.
"I'm not as good as I used to be, but I'm okay"
"I'm not as good as I used to be, but I'll try harder"
Don't be afraid to dream a little bigger darlin'
I SALSA UR FACE
✌ robert downey jr. · ewan mcgregor · jude law · johnny depp · colin farrell · jim carrey · tom hanks · wentworth miller · kevin spacey · george clooney · jeff bridges · jeremy renner · geoffrey rush · simon pegg · nick frost · colin firth · brad pitt · nicolas cage · leonardo dicaprio · sean penn · paul rudd · jason segel · clint eastwood · paul newman · marlon brando · matt damon · mark wahlberg · aaron paul · tim roth · etc
Secondly, don't let anyone ever make you feel like you don't deserve what you want.
HE ATE A BANANA
✌ quentin tarantino · tim burton · martin scorsese · stanley kubrick · coen brothers · danny boyle · steven spielberg · edgar wright · robert rodriguez · roman polanski · sidney lumet · david fincher · christopher nolan · alfred hitchcock · etc
Taste me, drink my soul
Show me all the things that I shouldn't know
When there's a new moon on the rise
I had everything, opportunities for eternity
And I could belong to the night
TALK DIRTY TO ME
✌ SONS OF ANARCHY · parks and rec · happy endings · friends · the good wife · supernatural · prison break · true blood · band of brothers · psych · lie to me · pushing daisies · harper's island · how i met your mother · torchwood · sons of anarchy · breaking bad · dexter · the it crowd · the office · etc
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And I really miss what really did exist
When I held your throat so tight
And I miss the bus as it swerved from us
Almost came crashing to its side
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moved
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"Anti-depressants? Anti-anxiety meds? How about Anti-RAGE meds."
Take 1/2 a tablet of Lorazepam, she told me.
I went out almost the whole of today. I don't really want to talk about that right now, although things weren't that bad. It was quite an enjoyable day actually. Things were fine, and I met with a friend who was good company and we caught a movie. Dr Lee wasn't unpleasant; there was nothing to be unpleasant about except that giant acne on my forehead. Overall, as usual, I felt like the whole world was looking down on me and wondering why I haven't moved an inch from where I fell- deep, right into the hell------- I meant, bottomless pit of a well.
Sitting right below, so far below, all I can see if sunlight, total darkness, and the occasional glaring pairs of eyes that look so ginormous from down below. Then there would be these heavy splashes of water. I guess I call it rain in here. Outside you guys probably call that spit and tears. They don't fit umbrellas in here, so I just duck for cover under this coffin I found dumped nearby. Guess what? We share the same initials and birth dates.
Anywayyyy, I came home, I was tired and upset. Periods suck. I can't be coherent at this point any more. All I can say is that the dryer broke or rather.. screamed for a bit, and then everyone fussed about trying to fix it. When it didn't even needed fixing. I felt like stomping out of the house in frustration, because my dad and I were arguing. Don't ask why.
But I didn't. I just felt so fucking angry. I wanted to burst to burst something to scratch to peel. In the end when they all finally went into the room, I just laid on the floor and cried. Like I've been doing a lot these days. Must be the medications.
Fast forward two hours.-- one hour plus. I bathed changed packed etc. Then I went to take my medications. Took 2 tablets of Lorazepam instead of 1/2. so it's dosage x 4. Is that that bad? ytd I took 1 whole tablet.
Idk, but it's making me incredibly HIGH and drowsy. I feel tipsy and incoherent akshdas
REALLY
also want more. she gave me an extra prescription because i'm seeing her next in ONE MONTH \o/
DO YOU THINK THE 21 TABLETS (FOR ONE MONTH AND A LITTLE EXTRA SHE GAVE ME) IS ENOUGH TO OVERDOSE ON AND LEAD TO HOPEFULLY ONE OF THE FOLLOWING?
CARDIAC HEART ARREST
HEART ATTACK
ASDASJHPROBLEMS???
IDKIDKIDK
INSTANT DEATH
CONFUSIONS DELUSIONS
average i should be taking 1/2 tablet per day. she's seeing me in one month = 31 day.
31 x 1/2 tablet = 16 +5 extra = 21
ONLY 5?????
i guess 21 would be enough to kill self.
but i don't know yet.
lol just kidding, that's the average dosage other people take for insomnia 4tablets a day or something.
did i tell you? today i just hate everyone. well, tonight. from 10pm-now. not including whoever i talked to online.
i'm also taking toparimate but based on wiki
Dosage The exact dosage of Topiramate depends on the diagnosis being treated. In order to avoid early side-effects (e.g. cognitive dysfunction) the initial dosage normally is low and increased in slow steps. The usual initial dosage is 25 to 50 mg daily in 2 single doses. Common dosages for maintenance treatment are 100 to 200 mg daily. The highest dosage recommended is 400 mg daily in divided doses, but higher doses have been used in patients using Topiramate as a primary seizure medication, doses upto 1600mg/day have been well tolerated.
Sounds like unless I take over 16 pills a day, I'm going to be sunshine.
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E-mail: EMAIL HERE
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30 day challenge / facts abt me <- aka more rl related
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