I'm a big fan of television, movies and music. AND HANDSOME GUYS DUH I love discovering new tv shows, new fandoms, new artists. NEW FAVORITES TO UH STALK? LUST OVER?? I'm trying to start reading and writing again.
"I'm not as good as I used to be, but I'm okay"
"I'm not as good as I used to be, but I'll try harder" Don't be afraid to dream a little bigger darlin'
I SALSA UR FACE
✌ robert downey jr. · ewan mcgregor · jude law · johnny depp · colin farrell · jim carrey · tom hanks · wentworth miller · kevin spacey · george clooney · jeff bridges · jeremy renner · geoffrey rush · simon pegg · nick frost · colin firth · brad pitt · nicolas cage · leonardo dicaprio · sean penn · paul rudd · jason segel · clint eastwood · paul newman · marlon brando · matt damon · mark wahlberg · aaron paul · tim roth · etc
Secondly, don't let anyone ever make you feel like you don't deserve what you want.
HE ATE A BANANA
✌ quentin tarantino · tim burton · martin scorsese · stanley kubrick · coen brothers · danny boyle · steven spielberg · edgar wright · robert rodriguez · roman polanski · sidney lumet · david fincher · christopher nolan · alfred hitchcock · etc
Taste me, drink my soul
Show me all the things that I shouldn't know
When there's a new moon on the rise
I had everything, opportunities for eternity
And I could belong to the night
TALK DIRTY TO ME
✌ SONS OF ANARCHY · parks and rec · happy endings · friends · the good wife · supernatural · prison break · true blood · band of brothers · psych · lie to me · pushing daisies · harper's island · how i met your mother · torchwood · sons of anarchy · breaking bad · dexter · the it crowd · the office · etc
Follow my blog with Bloglovin And I really miss what really did exist
When I held your throat so tight
And I miss the bus as it swerved from us
Almost came crashing to its side
much has happened lately
1) immense excitement upon planning to get a dog and utter disappointment when request was unexpectedly denied.
2) signed up for two subjects, math and eng, at ite under their part time general education scheme. it is a long road ahead for the weak and stupid.
3) had planned to get a wii, but decided it's going to become a white elephant eventually.
4) realized i still have strong angry feelings whenever i don't get my way (eg childish, spoiled, brat)
5) haven't watched any tv or movies in five thousand years; want to go to the cinema but not motivated enough. even missed my sherlock holmes two, the most anticipated movie ever
6) was listening to a lot of music last week but can't seem to do so anymore this week
this week. this week has been utter crap since the weekend started. i knew it would be bad. it was bad. i just pray that tomorrow, friday, will be a good one. it'll be fantastic. i am going to gen's house to cook and dear god please let everything go well. i want to enjoy myself and have a good time. i am stressed and worried about eating the food since although i eat huge amounts i am uncomfortable eating out and eating rice. but last week we ate out and it was okay... so i just hope things will be all right tomorrow.
i am still depressed about not being able to get a dog. i wish i could teach it tricks and train it to do stuff. but i know it's not important. what's important is that our family doesn't get all fed up with each other just over this conflict on getting a dog.
it's weird. an hour ago i could've sworn i put all my feelings and thoughts about the dog behind me. washed away. no longer sad, no longer upset. just happy that i've accepted reality.
and yet right now i feel sort of unhappy again. like life is shit. everything is shit. i will always be shit.
learned today that my sister used to have imaginary friends whom she spoke to and heard back from and had even seen them..
wish i could have such creativity and strong imagination
wish and only wishing i could be so much more
what awaits me in life? setting myself up for failure and disappointments to overcome. hardships to fight through.. i wish i weren't such a pessimist.
i have never been bullied in my life. yet i left school. because i didn't want to go. i had failed myself, not realizing the importance of completing my education. not just that, there are plenty of activities and experiences that come with school life. and friendships. all these i missed out on and rotted at home and degraded, for the past seven years.
now i lie to myself that all will be okay, even though i am trying to change at beyond a snail's pace, it will eventually work out. i lie to myself that i can do it. optimistic people look at it as motivating themselves. i wish i could see it their way.
in life we are all alone. always. even with love from family/friends or company... we're still alone.
maybe it comes with living in a city-ish life. people who live in the countryside have no internet and no media influences and no etc etc
they have only books and animals and nature.
music can't make me happy anymore, but i've been addicted to this song lately so i'm going to post it here
takeru is adorable o//o
also, i realized i like hide's music. x japan is great but i haven't listened to much of their songs. hide is amazing ;_; why's he got to be not around anymore.
i remember this promise i made to myself years ago, and thought about every year.
"i would kill myself when i turned 21, unless i got the success/my life back"
don't think it will happen. i'm 21 next year. i'm still the most hideous person ever.
anyway, l'arc~en~ciel is coming to sg. gen wants to get tickets. i hope we can settle on a good priced tickets, not too expensive ones but with good seating. i would pay a lot for dir en grey or the gazette but i'm sadly not too familiar with l'arc~en~ciel. hyde is really pretty though. but that's not really enough reason to spend so much money on.
