I'm a big fan of television, movies and music. AND HANDSOME GUYS DUH I love discovering new tv shows, new fandoms, new artists. NEW FAVORITES TO UH STALK? LUST OVER?? I'm trying to start reading and writing again.
"I'm not as good as I used to be, but I'm okay"
"I'm not as good as I used to be, but I'll try harder" Don't be afraid to dream a little bigger darlin'
I SALSA UR FACE
✌ robert downey jr. · ewan mcgregor · jude law · johnny depp · colin farrell · jim carrey · tom hanks · wentworth miller · kevin spacey · george clooney · jeff bridges · jeremy renner · geoffrey rush · simon pegg · nick frost · colin firth · brad pitt · nicolas cage · leonardo dicaprio · sean penn · paul rudd · jason segel · clint eastwood · paul newman · marlon brando · matt damon · mark wahlberg · aaron paul · tim roth · etc
Secondly, don't let anyone ever make you feel like you don't deserve what you want.
HE ATE A BANANA
✌ quentin tarantino · tim burton · martin scorsese · stanley kubrick · coen brothers · danny boyle · steven spielberg · edgar wright · robert rodriguez · roman polanski · sidney lumet · david fincher · christopher nolan · alfred hitchcock · etc
Taste me, drink my soul
Show me all the things that I shouldn't know
When there's a new moon on the rise
I had everything, opportunities for eternity
And I could belong to the night
TALK DIRTY TO ME
✌ SONS OF ANARCHY · parks and rec · happy endings · friends · the good wife · supernatural · prison break · true blood · band of brothers · psych · lie to me · pushing daisies · harper's island · how i met your mother · torchwood · sons of anarchy · breaking bad · dexter · the it crowd · the office · etc
Follow my blog with Bloglovin And I really miss what really did exist
When I held your throat so tight
And I miss the bus as it swerved from us
Almost came crashing to its side
Today- well yesterday, 21st of June 2012, our little baby rabbit turned 3 weeks old! Yes, she/he doesn't have a name yet because we couldn't agree on one. I wanted to name her Belle, or Lulu.. or I don't know, RORY if it were a male. My sister wants to name it Oogie Woogie because it wiggles and wiggles a lot.
SO uh, it still is without a name!
Only got some lousy pics taken with bad resolution but oh well, I'll update with better pics and videos when I take them in the next few days.
Two babies, one day old! Unfortunately one of them didn't make it. ):
Time to blog again, time to blog.. Life has been so dull, so very dull. It is my choice, obviously, but nevertheless dull. I chose dull. I chose not to do anything. And so, like the past few good years of my life wasted, I seem to be carrying on the tradition. 2012 started out great but since April, it's been a downfall.
I will not speak of all the dull things I did, or did not do but rather the pleasant things I have taken a liking to.
Not surprisingly, these do not include things associated with reality or like, things I should be getting on with. Getting a job, accepting the pains of being a woman, getting out of the house, not eating to become a bigger fatty fatty...
I have recently fallen in love with Doctor Who. Sherlock, Outsourced, Supernatural and Dawson's Creek deserve honorable mentions.
Doctor Who is seriously the most amazing tv show ever. Well, the most amazing thing to exist. I don't know why a few years back I thought I'd never get into the show. I had watched season one with the Ninth Doctor and while I liked it apparently I didn't like it enough. However, the fifth and sixth seasons have been mind blowingly, orgasmic-ally good. Matt Smith is so fucking awesome. I admit, I never took a liking to him based on pictures but he makes such a marvelous Doctor. And Amy and Rory? I never could say this before, but I can now because I think I've finally, finally found it. I've finally found my otp of otps of otps that I would die for. Before I'd always said I wouldn't ever be attracted to skinny-ish guys (although basically that's mostly because of my self esteem issues.. I'm a beach whale so-) but I've been so in love with Rory. Christ.
Aaaah the series is just so good. I'm off to go hunt for Doctor Who Confidential episodes. I hope I can find them without having to download the 720p version ones. Much as I would adore 720p I simply do not have the harddrive capacity for the files. ):
TV shows are seriously the best companion. The best things to get you through life. Movies are great and awesome but tv shows are just different. You just get so lost into them, and all that.
I just completed Outsourced yesterday and I'm just so depressed that the show never made it to season two. I'm sure they axed it because of people finding some of the jokes 'racist' or derogatory or something but hey it's just comedy brah. I don't know. But I'm in love with the show. So in .. love. So sad.. to see.. it go.. no more. No more! I love Todd so much. And all the other characters. Like Charlie. Who totally reminds me of Casey from Chuck which I sadly dropped out of watching during season 4. It's such a funny brilliant cute piece of a show. I just wish more people would watch it. Good shows always mostly get cancelled. Welp. It's the one show (among others..... [dear god I'm always typing amongst when the spelling check always tells me no such word exists. my english, my grammar- what has become of you???) that I actually laughed out loud to and I don't do that often. Yeah, sue me, I'm hard to humour sometimes. I don't know. UGGGH BUT OUTSOURCED WHY.
Then there Dawson's Creek which I just picked up today since I was bored at home making myself stupid and fat.. I never liked shows like Dawson's Creek in the past simply because I found romance cheesy. Just like how my sister views it now. I hated romance-y stuff just because.. but oh well, it's a good show, it's entertaining.. and I actually like the characters and find myself rooting for them so. I'm going to try and watch more of it! Michelle Williams is gorgeous in this. And young Joshua Jackson is somewhat adorable and makes me want to watch Fringe right after this. I never gave it time past episode two.. But I ought to. It looks so bloody good.
And Supernatural. Just got caught up last week or so with my sister on season 7. I've got to say, this season isn't too bad. I mean, for a while I've been feeling like the show hasn't been the best it could be. There was just so much angsty Dean and Sam and all their troubles and I know that's what makes the show but too much is not a good thing. I'd still loved Supernatural, and Dean and Sam and all the characters but there was nothing that compelled me to continue. It was not a matter of urgency to watch the show... After watching season 7 I felt like the writers were more aware of where they were heading for this season as compared to the last.. few or so, I don't know. Don't really recall much and can't really talk but the past few seasons have been a little messy-ish?? Anyway, season 7 leaves me pretty damn excited for season 8. Oh hell yeah purgatory!! All right I suppose the past few seasons haven't been that bad, maybe one or two of them were a little less satisfying or spectacular but anyway fans will always be with the show so none of that matters.
But, but, I've found myself more drawn into Castiel's character this season 7. Okay I liked him before but not on the scale of like that most fans have for Castiel aka truly madly deeply (and that's probably because I never paid enough attention while watching some episodes and I couldn't connect well enough with the characters for some reason) but this season 7.. I just want to love him so much, so much more. I was so glad to find out that he hadn't been killed off. RIP Bobby though. I really thought they'd have him stick around longer...
Anyway, back on Cas.. Maybe we're all just in love with broken characters, and that's what makes Supernatural so damn awesome. In a way. Ugh I love the Cas who retained the memories of what he'd done.. although I also love the Cas who was so clueless and had a wife. Emanuel. Poor Daphne, wife of his. He just dropped out on her and that was it. Cas, oh Cas. I'm not a psychology student and I'm a retarded person, quite so--- basically I can't type or express myself well so I can't really say, but the way Cas was broken and the way he acted.. it just made me love him so much more? Ah I don't know what I'm saying. I've always loved Cas just... now so much more hakfhdsklajfhsd
Maybe one day I'll love Loki as much as 99.9% of the fandom. See, I was so in love with The Avengers, the fandom and all that, and I was into it for a while, trying to learn all things there was to learn, immerse myself deeply, pick up the Marvel comics and get reading.. then I suppose in a way I was kinda scared of the way the fanbase grew.. and for some stupid bloody reason because I didn't like liking things that were so massively huge, I stopped caring as much for The Avengers and all them heroes and handsome bastards. Oh well no doubt I still LOVE LOVE them, but I don't fangirl much anymore.
Okay to be 100% honest, it kind of has something to do with seeing status updates on facebook, from friends I would die to be close to but am sadly not close to, posting pictures/links/etc/etc things relating to the Avengers, from tumblr. I guess on one hand I was jealous- like hey! I wish I knew all you guys and could fangirl with all you guys but we're not that close akjfhskladfha I want in as well. I want to talk about how goddamn handsome Chris Hemsworth is. How irresistable RDJ is. How fucking handsome Chris Evans is. What a beautiful person Mark Ruffalo is. How everyone should appreciate and grow to love Coulson and also Hawkeye and Black Widow. BUT BUT I COULDN'T. I was unable to say or comment anything. I just clicked 'like' on some few posts and then I felt it was stupid because it wasn't going to make them talk to me and I was such a coward and couldn't just say hi so I just quit the whole thing. Like ugh whatever I'm jealous and yet I--- I just wish I could hang with the cool crowd man. Okay not exactly cool crowd but people who liked the same things I like!!! They love Sherlock and Supernatural too and basically they are on tumblr so. Not that I bother to go on tumblr much anymore. Too much scrolling hurts my eyes and basically I have no one on tumblr anymore since I abandoned my old blog.
TD;LR I wish I could join their fangirling conversations because I have NO ONE to fangirl with!!!! I want to talk about the handsome guys and talk about the ships and characters and uggggh. The Avengers fandom on tumblr is really fucking amazing though. Some of the AU gifs and things they come up with are so fantastic. The fanart, the fanfic.. everythng. It's so beautiful.
Just a lonely despicable person ranting.
Honestly, facebook makes me mad. It drives me mad with jealousy. The lives people live. The friends they have. Nobody talks to me because I chose to fade out of the world. Then I can't walk back in cause I'm scared and insecure and make excuses for myself like getting very fat and rubbish. Rubbish! I even have dreams of these cool people in which we actually hang out. That is how pathetic I fucking am.
Wow, all my blog posts always get right to the negative. I'm a negative person. I talk like dying doesn't bother me and I'd sooner get on with it but truth be told I'm scared of dying and I don't want to live this way but I'm so fucking stuck!
Yes so anyway facebook makes me mad because I'm not living the life I should be living. I'm not dressing the way girls my age dress. My body is humongous and ugly and dirty and not like them pretty likable girls. Worse of all, my personality!! My very being is so repulsive and I am not educated! I can't be normal because I've fallen so out of touch with reality.
I think it's all in my head. Too much thinking........ too much not thinking..... way too much sitting.
FOR THE PAST THREE YEARS, AT LEAST, I HAVE BEEN SITTING ON MY ASS FOR AT LEAST A GOOD 80% PORTION OF THE DAY. AND OUT OF THE PAST THREE YEARS, I HAVE PROBABLY ONLY LEFT THE HOUSE ON 1 OUT OF EVERY 14 DAYS.
maybe i should wipe my memory.
well, enough talk. this post is all words. I got no pics, but maybe some stupid youtube videos. ugh. bloody hell.
